Last night, I posted on my Instagram (@kmvenez hmu ayyye) an open call for a Q&A so you can get to know me a little better and two things happened. A surprising amount of questions came in, and a surprising amount of people (literally 30+ in over 8 hours) instantly unfollowed me. After a couple rounds of yelling “these hoes ain’t loyal” at my phone, here’s what we got!
A: (Since someone – hey Tafanie! – actually wanted me to answer those) Central Connecticut, I work as a mother’s assistant which is like a personal assistant and nanny hybrid while still working as a model/actress, my dog’s name is Tink and she is a 10 year old Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, and my shoe size is typically depending on the brand an 8!
A: The biggest difference in general is population size. (I just Googled this and laughed out loud) Where I grew up, the population as of 2010 was just under 20,000 people (we haven’t had a census in 7 years??? lmao) and New York City has a population of over 8,500,000. Population aside, there’s also the diversity. The town I grew up in was extremely white (specifically large Polish population) – I remember one of the first times I visited NYC as a kid I was enthralled at when I got on a subway, there was more or less someone of every ethic background. When I do go back home, there’s this spot off the Berlin Turnpike called Blue Lobster that’s making me drool just thinking about it. They have this clam chowder that is so GOOD that my extremely lactose intolerant body will tempt the fate of death just to eat it every time.
A: 1. The best experience I’ve had in the 4-ish years I’ve lived here would have to be the moment I got “escorted” into The Gotham Comedy Club. I was an intern there my junior year of college and my payment was free tickets to comedy shows, so the first time I went I got to cut in front of the line of these people who were clearly waiting there forever and my name was on this bougie list and I got this reserved-off-to-the-side-important-looking-red-leather-booth I was led to by this very large man who I’m pretty sure spoke no more than 6 words in total (not just to me, like in general I think that’s all he knew). My worst experience would have to be also my junior year of college where I broke up with and was stalked by my ex-boyfriend. To summarize a lot, we dated on and off for about 3-4 months (there was a lot of “I’m the boss, don’t even talk to your gay male friends, here’s material objects so you keep liking me” and victim blaming for his intense anger outbursts) and one night he got blackout drunk and punched me in the face and threw me over a couch and almost head first into a glass coffee table. So, I broke up with him. There was the initial “please I’m sorry I love you take me back” texts, then voicemails of him screaming and crying, then he somehow got a hold of my email address and sent me a novella about how he was going to live a life of anguish and solitude until I took him back laced with intermittent bits of how I made the whole thing up. These were all things I could block (phone numbers, emails, social media, etc.) until the day he broke into my apartment building. I still have no idea how, but he got past the security guy in the front of my apartment building, made it up to my floor and while I was home he slipped a “love letter” underneath my door. After immediately flying downstairs to ream out my landlord – hey Ada, you’re still a bitch – she informed me unless I gave them a picture of him that he could still get in whenever he wanted; but in order to do that I’d have to unblock him on social media, so you see where the problem came from. So to make an even longer story short, I unblocked his phone number for about 35 seconds in order to make myself perfectly clear that the next attempt in any way, shape, or form he made to get in contact with me would be sent to the police. (And just in case he decides to come out of the woodwork and wants to tempt a bitch, I still got the receipts – Dan what’s good?)
2. TINA FEY. I went to 30 Rock the other day to see a Seth Meyers taping and was just too choked up the entire time to pass as a normal human being.
3. I think ideally I’d love to make my own sketch comedy show, like if SNL and MadTV were to have a baby.
4. The last part of that question was interesting to me and I think actually what I’d go with. I feel like if I were to go back and try and tell my younger self, “do this, don’t do that” and if it were to actually impact the course of events in my life that I wouldn’t be where I am now. I thought my life was over when I moved back home for a year, but I ended up meeting the love of my life who I live with today. I thought my life was over when I was 17 (I think? Somewhere around there) and my internet boyfriend broke up with me, so my friend introduced me to this guy (who also…broke up with me…after 3 years in a Starbucks…) who helped me solidify that acting and things like that were what I wanted to do with my life. I think if I could have avoided a lot of the hurt, that would have been great, but I’m at the point in my life now where I can semi-lie to myself that most things happen for a reason and you deal with the cards you’re dealt with.
That’s all from everyone on Instagram, so now let’s wrap up with a little rapid-fire!
What’s your favorite candle scent? Fuck me up with a good hazelnut candle.
How old do you think you’ll be when you get married? Less than but probably around 30.
Can you do a split? If by do you mean eat and by split you mean banana, yes.
How many oceans have you swam in? Just one – Atlantic fo lyf y’all
How many countries have you been to? 2! I went to Canada in the 8th grade.
Is anyone in your family in the army? Both my grandfathers were actually in the Air Force, my maternal grandfather was a pilot in the Bloody Hundredth (look it up!)
What would you name your daughter if you had one? I like the name Violet.
What’s the worst grade you got on a test? When I was in 6th grade, I didn’t fully understand the concept of 0%-100% so I used to think that if you got a 50% that you at least did half ok…so I used to get a lot of 50% and didn’t understand why I was getting yelled at so much LMAO (I graduated college with a 3.64 GPA so it turned out ok!)
What was your favorite TV show when you were a child? The Wild Thornberrys
Did your mother go to college? She did! She has a degree in English.
Are your grandparents still married? Maternal side technically, but they’re dead…so…paternal side, my grandfather remarried after my grandmother died
Have you ever taken karate lessons? Nope
Do you know who Kermit the frog is? That’s my guy
What’s the first amusement park you’ve been to? Quassy, I think? Is Quassy still around?
What language, besides your native language, would you like to be fluent in? Used to be semi-fluent at one point in Italian and French, but I haven’t spoken it in a while so most of it has gone away
Do you know triplets? No, but my aunts are identical twins
Do you prefer Titanic or The Notebook? If by prefer you mean “which do you cry harder at”, Titanic
Have you ever had Indian food? Surprisingly, no
Have you ever been to Olive Garden? I am Olive Garden
What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender? Ironically enough, I think Michael was on the table at one point (it’s funny because that’s my boyfriend’s name)
If you have a nickname, what is it? Katie! (Yes, it’s not my real name, dundundun)
Who’s your favorite person in the world? Tina Fey!
Would you rather live in a rural area or in the suburbs? I think when I get old and fat, suburbs.
Can you whistle? Yes!
Do you eat breakfast every morning? I try to, even if it’s just a little protein bar.
Do you take any pills or medication daily? Yep! For my lack-of thyroid.
What medical conditions do you have? Hashimoto’s Thyroiditis-turned-Hypothyroidism after thyroidectomy, and Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome.
How many times have you been to the hospital? – So many. So many god damned times.
Have you ever seen Finding Nemo? – Many times.
Where do you buy your jeans? – Typically H&M.
What’s the last compliment you got? – After yelling at him to say I look cute in my outfit, hubs said I look cute in my outfit.
Do you usually remember your dreams in the morning? – Depending on how much melatonin has given me acid trip dreams, sometimes.
What flavor tea do you enjoy? – I like a good berry flavored tea.
How many pairs of shoes do you currently own? – Uh…probably around 7? 8? Maybe?
What religion will you raise your children to practice? I think I’d do what my parents did. I went to church (Congregationalist) until I was about 12 when I started to ask a lot of questions and said this doesn’t make sense, so my parents let me decide that I didn’t want to go anymore. I think I’d show them their options, and let them choose.
Why do you have a WordPress? I have a lot of thoughts and opinions on things that I am afraid to pressure my friends with knowing and need an outlet to source them to and if my friends happen to indirectly read it,
Alright, so there’s a good chunk of my life story! Let me know if there’s any new questions you’d like for next month!